No Second Chances. 

The last couple of days have been rough, really rough. I won’t go into the gory details but it has been a couple of days filled with lots of tears. Lots of soggy tissues and lots of panda eyes. Two days where my depression was clearly winning! But something happened yesterday that snapped me out of my despair and back to the harsh reality.

I spoke to my younger sister last night, who had a horrific experience yesterday. This got me to thinking about death and my own mortality.  My sister saw things and heard things that no one should ever have to see or hear. She was witness to a horrific, totally tragic and totally preventable motorbike accident. That killed a young man, almost instantly. She knelt next to a young man, talking to him, while he took his last, very shallow, breaths. Checked for a pulse. Waited for the paramedics. Comforted a mother and her 2 year old daughter, who’s stationary car the motorcyclist hit. She witnessed the second motorcyclist involved,  return to the scene of the accident and then leave again. Leaving his friend behind, dying on the side of the road,  surrounded by only a few strangers.

What my sister doesn’t realize yet, is what she did for these people was a gift. A gift to these strangers in their time of need, when they were at their most vulnerable. Truth be told, I am not surprised by her actions. My younger sister, Kelly, is the strongest person I know!!! And it is a real privilege and blessing to be her older sister. Truth be told, if it was me taking my last breaths, she is the first person I would want by my side. Talking to me and holding my hand. Comforting my children.

All of this has got to make you wonder!!! What sort of human being does that??? Leaves his friend, in his time of need, to die alone on the side of a very busy road. I, for one, wouldn’t leave a stranger,  or an animal,  on the side of the road to die alone!! Because no one deserves to die alone. It also makes you wonder, if that young man woke up yesterday and said to himself “Today is my last day!! I am going to die today!!” What would he have changed if he knew??? What would he have said to his friends, his family, his mother, if he knew it was his last day???
But he didn’t know he was going to die yesterday. He had no idea it was his last day on earth. And I’m sure if he did, he would have changed plenty and reconsidered that one, stupid decision, to ride at 120kms down a very busy road, in a 60km zone. Wearing only jeans and a leather jacket. I’m sure if he knew he was going to die, he would have told his loved ones how much he loved them. He would have hugged and held his mother, his father, his siblings, possibly his girlfriend, his wife, his children and his friends and said the things he wanted to say before his life was snuffed out by one stupid decision.

But tragically, he doesn’t get that chance, nor the chance for goodbyes. And furthermore, his loved ones don’t get that chance either. The chance for their last, very final goodbye.
In the end, in those final moments….those last breaths… “LOVE is all you need!!!” Nothing else matters. It doesn’t matter how much money you have in the bank, what sort of car you drive, what you have achieved or what kind of job you have. The only things that truly matter are love and being surrounded by the people you love and who love you, how you lived and the legacy you leave behind. There are no second chances!!

So the moral of this story is “Love the ones you are with!!” Say the things you need to say,  before it is to late. Get busy living. Because no one knows when it’s their last day on earth. There are no second chances!!!

Pass the bubble wrap,

Jo. Xx

#love #death #depression #life

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37 thoughts on “No Second Chances. 

  1. Hi Jo, your comment on my A Sandy highway post lead me to you and I’ve just finished reading this post. I don’t know you but you sound pretty amazing. You also sound like you’re going through a hard time. What a great thing your sister did. Truly life changing. And I agree with all you wrote. We only have one chance at life and none of us know what’s around the corner. Love, have no regrets and follow your heart for you’re so right – there are no second chances. Hope you have a nice Saturday, whatever you’re doing. Take care. xx

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Because of “Weird Guy with the dog” pointing this direction, I was able to read your account here. You posed a question “Who would leave someone to die alone..”? I don’t know, but given what you said about the speed of the bikers and lack of regard for their own safety etc…it’s possible there were chemical enhancements involved or they were drunk. The one that ran away probably didn’t want to answer a lot of questions from the police. My late husband often needed to go to the ER in the middle of the night in his last year. I was driving him there one morning at 2 a.m. (or thereabouts) and we came around the bend on a stretch of road and found a young man flagging us down. His bike was in the road, he’d crashed into the concrete barrier that separated the two sides of the road. He wanted help trying to stand the bike up so he could start it again (I guess)…and when I said I was calling 911 for him, got very agitated and started yelling at me to help him pick up the bike. I got back in the car and dialed the police, but there was no need. They were already looking for this guy, I don’t know for what purpose, but he was running from them when he crashed. I’m glad your sister had compassion for a stranger like that.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. I checked out your blog and read a few of your posts. I would have left some comments but it didn’t give me the option to. I am 42 and had a very serious accident 5 years ago. I have 10 screws and 2 plates in my foot. I sometimes use a walking stick/cane. I feel your pain. I hope your “Dickie” knee is feeling better shortly. Sending love and peace from Melbourne, Australia. Xx

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  3. Thank you for sharing this. We both have a sister Kelly, and they have both impacted us in their own ways. Glad we are bonded in this. Thanks for reading my post and for taking the time to leave a comment – it is strengthening, for sure.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Hi! I stumbled upon your article because I am following Miriam who re-blogged this post. I was moved. And I do agree that we should always live our life as if it would be our last, say the things that we want or need to say to all the people that matters to us. Great post!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. A touching story and very glad you put this out there for all to read – and remember what is truly important in life. To take a moment before we make certain decisions that could end it all. Every day is a bonus when we wake up breathing.

    thank you for posting this…. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Oh no need to apologise, people get it wrong in speech, even without a computer attached!!! haha I’m used to it. As long as it sounds similar I’m happy! hehe 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Thanks for commenting on my blog – it led me to yours. This is a very touching story. A friend of mine had a similar experience some years ago. He drove by right after an accident, stopped and held the hand of a young woman, comforting her as she said, “I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die!” And yet she did, before the paramedics got there. It shook him up, and even though I wasn’t there, I have always remembered it, both his kindness to her, and the way death can sneak up on any of us at any time.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. That is a very moving post! Your sister gave comfort to someone in what must have been the loneliest final moments of their life, time that we all hope we never spend alone. It’s hard to draw a positive from such a tragedy, but in time I hope your sister can feel proud of what she did, and from the previous comments it’s clear that you have connected with other people with your words, so keep writing, enjoy the freedom it brings, and keep reading other bloggers! If you haven’t already found him, a must read blogger is Stuart M. Perkins – his blog is called Storyshucker – if you need a bit of a lift on some days, read a story or two of his and I guarantee you will feel a bit better! Keep writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I honestly cried a little,seeing how fragile and unexpected our lives can be.It’s like a stopwatch,only we don’t know when it does stop.We often tend to forget that and take everything we have,including our heartbeats,for granted.I’m so sad about hearing this story,but also,very inspired about your sister’s act of kindness and love.You are amazing and God bless you!❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Hello Jo,
    thank you for your response on my post “Soon to be Goodbye”. I am a firm believer that those with the most tortured souls also have the most beautiful ones. If people only took the time to see past the “shell”. My mother was written off as a failure by most of the world, including her own family and children. However, me and my younger sister have remained loyal to her through it all. Although we had a horrible childhood and buried way to many people, she was and is our one and only mother! I don’t think that knowing someone is going to die is any better than just losing them. Yes we get to say goodbye, but the not knowing when is pure torture. I am sorry you lost someone you loved; death is always hard. Most people will see my mother passing as a relief from the worry and stress she may have caused them in the past due to her mental illness and life choices. Yet she is now one of my best friends and saying goodbye just isn’t natural. I have many “strangers” hold my hand on the side of the road(so to speak). My life has been made up of beautiful people like your sister and yourself. There is power in just telling the story and as a Christian that is called a testimony and happened with purpose. So thank you again for your response and for inviting me to reading your blog.
    Jenny

    Liked by 1 person

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